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  Look In My Drawer

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  The Sound Of A Crack

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  My Grandfather Left Me Everything He’d Built – Valued At $3,500,000 – And The Parents Who Cut Me Off At 18 Walked Into The Reading Grinning, Saying They’d Take The Wheel, But When The Judge Turned To The Next Page, Their Smiles Finally Cracked.

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  The Wrong Container

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  A Minor Event

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  I Said Goodbye To My Brother 42 Years Ago. Last Week, At 2:00 A.m., A City Number Lit My Phone And A Voice Said, “mark… It’s Leo.”

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  The Last Dance Was Mine

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  I Drove 8 Hours Through A Snowstorm With A Lemon Pie – Walked In To Find My Sister’s Fiancé In My Chair, And Mom Said “it’s Just Immediate Family This Year”

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  After I Became A Widow, My Daughter Said, “either You Work, Or You’re Out On The Street!”

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  “where’s The ‘phantom Fiancé,’ Clara?” The Day My Family Laughed At Me, And Then A Helicopter Landed In Their Yard.

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  “tone It Down For Your Sister.” I Didn’t – So My Parents Skipped My Wedding. Three Weeks Later They Said They “never Got The Invite”… And Now They Want Me At Hers To Protect Their Image.

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  My Wife’s Mother Will Be At Christmas – Try Not To Embarrass Us,” My Son Smirked. I Smiled. He Didn’t Know I’d Invited Someone Too. When The Doorbell Rang And The Attorney Stepped In, His Face Went Pale.