Two elderly women, who hadn’t seen each other since high school, reunited at their 60th high school reunion. They were excitedly catching up on all the years that had passed.
One woman shared that she had been married four times. Her friend was astonished and exclaimed, “Four times! You’ve had four husbands?”
“Yes,” replied the woman. “My first husband was a banker, the second an actor, then a rabbi, and my current husband is an undertaker.”
Her friend was puzzled and asked, “That’s quite a variety. Why did you choose such different men?”
With a twinkle in her eye, the woman responded, “I had a purpose for that. One for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.”
In another heartwarming tale, there was a little old lady who was very spiritual. Every day, she would step out onto her porch, raise her arms to the sky, and shout, “Praise the Lord!”
However, her new neighbor, an atheist, found this daily display irritating. After putting up with it for a month, he decided to confront her. One day, he went outside and yelled, “There is no Lord!”
But the little old lady paid no mind and continued her daily praise.
One cold, snowy day, the elderly woman couldn’t make it to the store. She went out to her porch, raised her hands up to the sky, and pleaded, “Help me, Lord. I have no more money, it’s cold, and I have no more food.”
The next morning, she found three bags of groceries on her porch, enough to last her a week. Overjoyed, she shouted, “Praise the Lord!”
Her atheist neighbor jumped out from the bushes and declared, “Ha! There is no Lord. I bought those groceries for you!”
Not missing a beat, the little old lady raised her arms to the sky once more and exclaimed, “Praise the Lord, you sent me groceries and you made the Devil pay for them!”
