Picture this: you’re cruising down the highway in your snazzy new car, feeling like king or queen of the road. Suddenly, you hit a pothole, and your seat wiggles like it’s trying to join a dance party you didn’t RSVP to. Sounds terrifying, right? Well, buckle up because, believe it or not, this isn’t just road-dystopia imagination—it’s a reality for some unfortunate Kia owners.

Welcome to the splendid saga of Kia’s recent vehicular recall, where one weebly-wobbly detail—missing bolts from the seats—may have brought 22,000 little ‘oops’ into existence. Yes, you heard right—23,000 cars are being recalled because it seems one worker at the assembly plant might have been daydreaming about donuts instead of diligently fastening seats. And voila, a recall worthy of the automotive hall of shame was born.

So, here we are, backseat psychologists trying to figure out how a singular lapse in judgment created a snowball effect that has snowballed all the way into the parking lots of Kia EV9 owners. Granted, recalls in the auto world are as common as finding yet another sequined ball gown on award show night—albeit, usually, they revolve around brakes or airbags, not the screws that keep your derrière from unexpectedly reaching the car floor.

For those out of the car geek loop, the models that now require a little additional seat anchoring attention are the glamorous Kia EV9s. These electric beauties rolled off the assembly lines between September 2023 and October 2024, during the cyber-buzzing bustle of South Korea’s automotive hub, Gwangmyeong. Destined to be unleashed on American roads by October 2023 and tumble its way through in the UK by next month, the EV9 carries a message from destiny itself: “With great seats, comes great responsibility—or at least, some screws.”

An unapologetic examination of the situation reveals that, indeed, a singular worker perhaps didn’t see the forest for the trees—or rather, the screws for the seats. What makes this head-scratcher even more curious is how, according to the droll yet factual documentation, “The second and/or third-row seat mounting bolts may be missing,” thus encouraging passengers to reluctantly audition for unexpected impromptu acrobatics.

But fret not, fellow road warriors! Salvation arrives no later than January 2025. Letters will flutter into mailboxes like auto-industry pigeons, making dear EV9 owners aware of said bolt shortage. Kia, showing its finest manners, has assured customers that the bolt crisis can be tamed swiftly. Local dealerships will joyously scurry to inspect, and install these missing bits of metal wizardry at no cost. Don’t you feel all warm and fuzzy already?

And there it is—a gracious move indeed from the masterminds at Kia—a nod to service with a smile. Honestly, their customer-centric ethos could very well restore faith in the firm commitment to the small things that hold the larger things together. But if coil-wrenching stories like these don’t remind us of the complex ballet that goes into crafting our dream drives, what will?

In conclusion, while this automotive faux pas certainly won’t win any manufacturer a gold star, it does grant us a story to chortle over, not to mention a practical lesson in the importance of every nut and bolt. In Mary’s humble opinion, let Kia’s bolt folly be a tale told cautiously in corporate circles—a reminder that sometimes the devil isn’t just in the details, it’s with the worker who might have forgotten them.