When you get married, trust, respect, and support form the foundation for a strong bond. But sometimes, these crucial elements may be missing, causing stress and instability. Issues like these can arise from insecurities, power struggles, or mental health challenges. Recently, one of our readers reached out with a heartfelt letter, seeking advice about her husband’s troubling behavior.
Here’s her story
I’m a 35-year-old woman, and my wonderful husband, who’s 40, and I have generally had a good relationship with few issues. He’s been an amazing partner, always doing thoughtful things to show he cares about me, and I reciprocate those gestures. Lately, though, his behavior has changed in a way that I barely recognize. I’ve noticed a series of troubling behaviors from him that I can no longer overlook.
For instance, I discovered on Facebook that one of our former classmates was in a serious car accident. When I mentioned it to him, he just shrugged and said he didn’t really know her well, so it didn’t matter. While it’s understandable that he might not feel deeply for someone he wasn’t close to, his unexpected insensitivity, given the severity of her injuries, was shocking to me.
Another incident occurred last Halloween. I came home exhausted and stressed from a difficult day at work. Instead of offering comfort or trying to understand what was bothering me, he decided to scare me with a prank. I ended up crying and having a breakdown, feeling completely overwhelmed. He just laughed and went back to watching TV as if nothing happened.
Last year, my mom passed away. We were very close, and I keep her favorite bracelet on a table surrounded by photos of her. One day, the bracelet vanished. When I asked my husband about it, he bluntly replied, ‘I sold it.’ An hour later, the bracelet mysteriously reappeared. When I confronted him, he looked me dead in the eye and said it was a prank, adding, ‘You should have seen your face’!
I love him, but this change in his behavior is alarming and unacceptable. I’m not sure how to address this issue. Should I seek help from a therapist? I’m struggling with how to approach him about these concerns.
