Using Preferred Names and Pronouns to Show Respect

These days, using someone’s preferred name and pronouns is the best way to demonstrate respect and acknowledgment of their identity. Unfortunately, not everyone adheres to this practice, often clinging to outdated norms or disregarding individuals’ gender identities.

A recent story shared by Bennett Kaspar-Williams, a 37-year-old individual, sheds light on the challenges faced by transgender people during pregnancy and childbirth. Bennett, who now identifies as non-binary and uses both he/him/his and they/them pronouns, welcomed their son Hudson into the world in October 2020. However, their journey was not without difficulties.

During their stay at the hospital, nurses repeatedly misgendered Bennett, referring to them as a mother instead of a father. Despite specifying their gender on medical forms, the nursing staff continued to misgender them during interactions. This left Bennett feeling disheartened and frustrated.

Bennett’s experience highlights the importance of disconnecting womanhood from motherhood. He emphasized that not all women can become mothers, and not all people who carry children are mothers. The assumption that all individuals with a uterus can conceive and carry children is a false equivalency.

Bennett began his transition in 2014 and underwent top surgery but did not pursue procedures on his lower body. Going through pregnancy and childbirth while identifying as male was both fulfilling and challenging for him. He believes that it is crucial to recognize that childbirth is no longer limited to a specific gender identity.

Bennett’s story demonstrates the complexities of identity and the significance of respecting individuals’ self-identification. It is essential to understand that gender is not solely determined by physical characteristics but also encompasses personal feelings and experiences.

What are your thoughts on this story and the importance of using preferred names and pronouns? Let us know in the comments!