We’ve been together for 3 years. He was playing a video game and has been playing it a lot lately. I don’t know exactly what it is, I asked before but he never wanted to talk about it with me. It’s some shooting game. He was playing it a lot and it was Thanksgiving.
He’s been playing it for the past month. I asked him if he could turn it off so we could spend some time together and watch a holiday movie. He kept saying later. I had enough waiting around for him so I asked him to turn it off and he said later.
I stood in front of it and told him to turn it off so we can watch a movie and he started yelling at me to move and I said no and he got up and punched me. Which he never did before or anything like that. By the way he is 6’ and 200 pounds and I’m 5’2 and 105 pounds.
He tried to say he was sorry but I went to the bathroom and locked myself away from him. I just texted my friend to come pick me up and I told him I was gonna stay somewhere else. He said he understood. He has been texting me and saying sorry. But I feel like he went too far.
Check out how the community responded:
FantasticBossWifey − You don’t come back from physical abuse. Ask your friends to go with you to collect your things! Not only did he hit you but he showed you all day that you are not as important as a video game. Good luck to you.
Glum-Bottle8313 − If he’ll hit you over a video game he will hit you over anything. Do not go back.
Longjumping-Oil-7419 − Nope, there’s 2 kinds of guys. One that will never lay a hand on a woman and one that will.
melisande_shahrizai_ − It’s so hard to see clearly when you’re in the middle of the confusing emotional rollercoaster of a toxic, controlling, a**sive relationship. I recommend you read the book Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft.
I believe it’s important knowledge for most people in general to understand, even if you don’t think it applies to your situation. It’s available on kindle, audible, and there is even a free PDF
I was in an a**sive relationship for 10 years, and I’ve been out for over 2 years now. I didn’t even realize the weight I was carrying on my shoulders until I was out and felt it lift. I’ve done a lot of therapy and healing work, but that effort is so worth it as it does get better.. You are not alone
RVAMeg − NO THERE IS NOT. It was a video game. You are a PERSON. Stay away from him.
wvclaylady − Trust me. I’ve been there sweetie. Have a zero tolerance attitude. I lived my whole adult life with this, I’m 56. Living in constant fear is not living. I would suggest breaking up with him. And I hope you’re ok. (((Hug)))
justafruityfruit − You don’t “feel” like he went too far. He went too far. There is no justification for punching someone besides self defense. This goes beyond whatever video game he’s addicted to. If I were to guess this isn’t the only issue you in your relationship.
Remember your life is your choice and you need to ask yourself if this is what you want for the rest of your life. I am sorry this happened to you, you didn’t deserve it and it’s not your responsibility to forgive someone.
RantyMcThrowaway − No. Simply put. You don’t come back from physical abuse. It only gets worse. Don’t waste more of your life with someone who uses violence to control you.
maidofwords − No one has said this yet, but be prepared for him to act very repentant and love bomb you after this. DO NOT FALL FOR IT. It’s just a step in the abuse cycle and a tactic to draw you in. Start making your exit plan now.
tahitianmoonchild − Leave him and never take him back! I wish 27-year-old me could have seen the future and left my bf after the first hit that he was so sorry about. It will get worse. Don’t waste 16 years (of your best years especially) like I did. Lost my childbearing years and precious time with family and friends as he isolated me. Don’t be me, please!
Violence in any form, regardless of the circumstances, is a serious breach of trust and safety in a relationship. What do you think are the crucial next steps for someone facing this situation? How can they navigate the complex emotions that come with it? Share your thoughts and advice below.
