Once upon a time in the desert, an old cowboy found himself crawling through the scorching sand. His horse had succumbed to thirst and he was certain that his time was running out. But then, a glimmer of hope appeared in the form of an object sticking out of the sand a few yards away.
Summoning his last ounce of strength, the old cowboy crawled towards the mysterious object and pulled it out of the sand. To his surprise, it was an old briefcase. And when he opened it, out popped a genie. But this was no ordinary genie – she was an ATO auditor genie, complete with a badge, a dull grey dress, and a calculator in her pocketbook. She even had a pencil tucked behind one ear.
“Well, old cowboy,” said the genie, “You know how I work. You have three wishes.”
The old man, hesitant and suspicious of an ATO auditor genie, replied, “I’m not falling for this. I’m not going to trust you.”
The genie, undeterred, retorted, “What do you have to lose? You’ve got no transportation, and it looks like you’re a goner anyway!”
The old cowboy pondered the genie’s words for a moment and came to a decision. “Okay,” he said, “I wish I were in a lush oasis with plenty of food and drink.”
In an instant, with a loud POOF, the old cowboy found himself in the most magnificent oasis he had ever laid eyes upon. He was surrounded by jugs of wine and platters of delectable food.
Satisfied with his first wish, the genie asked, “Okay, old boy, what’s your second wish?”
The old man, now filled with a sense of wonder and excitement, replied, “My second wish is to be rich beyond my wildest dreams.”
Once again, with a swift POOF, the old cowboy found himself standing amidst a treasure trove of rare gold coins and precious gems. His eyes widened in disbelief as he took in the sight of the countless riches surrounding him.
With one wish remaining, the genie warned, “Okay, cowpuncher, you have just one more wish. Make it count!”
The old man paused, deep in thought. After a few moments, he spoke his final wish, “I wish that no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me.”
And in an instant, with a final POOF, the old cowboy’s form changed. He was transformed into… a tampon.
And so, the moral of the story becomes clear – if the government offers you anything, there’s bound to be a string attached…