A funny story about tattoos:

My girlfriends name is Wendy and I had it tattooed on my unit.

When it’s flaccid you can only see WY. On a trip to the Caribbean I went to the bathroom and was standing at the trough next to a local.

I briefly gazed down and saw that he too had WY tattooed on his unit. I asked him if his girlfriends name was also Wendy. He said ‘No. When I am aroused it says “Welcome to Jamaica”.

A man and a woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant.

Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few paces away noticed that the man was slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, with the woman acting unconcerned.

The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out of sight under the table.

Still, the woman dining across from him appeared calm and unruffled, apparently unaware that her dining companion had disappeared.

After the waitress finished taking the order, she came over to the table and said to the woman,

“Pardon me, ma’am, but I think your husband just slid under the table.”

The woman calmly looked up at her and replied firmly,

“No he didn’t. He just walked in the door.”